David Oscar must end the crap on Viasat1

Whoever advised David Oscar to quit his daytime job so he could take up comedy as a career had done him a great disservice. It would have been better if he had advised him to throw himself into the ocean. It would have been better for him to have been shot in the groin than walk about so he could get the energy to host that t crap of a show called, Laugh A Minute on Viasat 1. He is simply pathetic on the show.

It has been more than a month since the show started airing and I can confidently say the feedback became has been extremely disastrous: Take that crap off air to save him from further embarrassment; I hear a voice say to the owners of the station. The show is the ugliest thing I have ever come across in my life, at least since I started watching comedy show as a kid and now an adult. There is nothing funny about either David Oscar himself or the content he provides on each day.

I was one of those to have seen the first episode of the show. I happened to have bumped into the show at an eatery at Osu. The show had barely travelled the halfway mark when I told friends I was sipping drinks with that it was not fit as junk.

Watching the show is like sticking a sharp knife to your own throat; it stinks, to even be charitable to him. The unfortunate thing is that almost every episode gets worse by the day. On the 17th of November, 2010 I was out with my friends at a drink joint when they started the show. Almost everyone especially the ladies chuckled.

‘This guy is miserable on set, one lady retorted. Another who said David Oscar, the presenter, is a friend could not even hide her embarrassment. She said she had advised him to quit the show to save him from further disgrace from the public. On that particular show, he brought a placard on stage with the inscription ‘Tsofi or Turkey tail is good for boys and girls.’ Whoever advised him to include that with the intent of getting the audience to crack their ribs got it all wrong.

He received endless insults and more chuckles from almost anyone who entered the premises. His actions on stage could best be described as putting a tortoise in the same track with a horse for a race. The answer is best kept than answered.

Yes we Gyan’

My criticisms of Ghanaian striker Asamoah Gyan is well known to everyone. I’m one of the least supporters of him. He is the luckiest striker this country has ever had especially when one compares him to that of Tony Yeboah or Prince Polley, all former national stars. They were heavy weights upfront especially Tony Yeboah.

His feet knew the goal post more than any striker in my life time. Asamoah Gyan does not come anywhere close to him and I stand by that. I literally roasted him after Ghana exited the World Cup at the quarter final stage, thanks to his rush to miss kick a penalty which could have taken the country to a historic semi final berth. I spent days cursing him on my facebook page. Like most Ghanaians, I thought he let us down by that judgment. I tore him apart with such viciousness that a friends began pleading for me to cease fire.

He has a love and hate relationship with football fans and for a striker who is wasteful upfront, he has equally stood up to the plate when all looked bleak. His exploits at Angola 2010 back in January was one of such. There are many instances to put to as both his bright and dark moments with football fans. However, what matters the most at the moment is his recent performance for his English club, Sunderland.

The man has become the star attraction for the BLACK CATS, since joining them after the World Cup. He arrived in England with huge expectation on his shoulders. The English Premier league is one of the hottest in the world. It has an unattractive following across the world, including Ghana.

The media are as vicious as the fine quality of the league. So most of us were worried about how they will receive Gyan especially when one considered that he scored less than 10 goals for his club, Stade Rennes in France prior to cross over to England.

But after some breath-taking league games and goal scoring moments everyone, including myself, are eating our humble pies. He has, without a shred of doubt, forced most of us to applaud him. He has scored in every league game he has since played for Sunderland and if the equalizer against Tottenham Hotspurs in London was something special, then the game against Chelsea at Stamford Bridge was glorious.

He spearheaded the attack of the Black Cats and they clawed their way into the hearts of Chelsea by thumping them 3 goals. It was an unbeliever spectacle. Sunderland beating Chelsea at the bridge? It’s a rather sick joke prior to the game. But the gospel truth is that Chelsea were reduced to rubbles by the cats.

Gyan had said before the game that he was going to beat Chelsea but most people thought it was the usual joke. Chelsea had not lost any game at home since last year’s February and if any club is to beat them, it should not be Sunderland. They were wrong. Gyan and his colleagues headed out of London with all smiles on their team bus, thanks to goals from Onuoha, Gyan and Ghanaian born British Danny Welbeck.

Gyan has been nominated for this year’s BBC African Footballer of the Year award and I just voted for him. I’m really campaign for him to win and I pray he wins, to cap a great year for 2010

Did J.A. Kufour sample any bottom?

Dishonorable Member of Parliament for Asokwa in the Ashanti Region, Maxwell Kofi Jumah, obviously has an oral cavity that leaks. He talks by-heart and for somebody who makes laws for sane people and expects them to abide by it, that is a worrying trend. His recent comments about the former mayor of the Kumasi Metropolitan Assembly, Patricia Appiagyei show how cheap he can be. He says the woman used her buttocks to secure the job as KMA, which he once occupied. He comes across as a dirty and filthy speaker, whose contributions to issues have been horrendous. He told a radio station in Kumasi that if Ms Appiagyei thinks she can, once again, use her ‘bottom’ to unseat him so she takes over his seat, then she must be joking.

“'She thinks she succeeded me as a Metro Chief Executive, and because of that, she can unseat me as an MP. Let me tell her, she can use her bottom to secure the mayor position, but as an MP, it is about elections,'

The political loose cannon has since apologise but I’m a bit surprise about how his own MPs have deliberately turned a blind eye to his reckless comments. He should be hauled before their so-called ‘appointment committee’ for him to answer for his unguarded comments, and provide answers as to who and who benefitted from the ‘bottom’ services. They are quick to issue threats about inviting people to appear before that useless ‘appointments committee’ for the innocuous write up about them and, yet, are unable to bring their own member to book for his ‘by-heart’ comments.

I remember how upset they were when the Africa Watch magazine published an article which ranked most of them for their poor performance. The rather true story did not go down with most of them and out of stupidity; they decided to summon the publisher of the report. Thank God he did not come. Such self importance.

Per appointment into such a political office, the appointment of Ms. Appiagyei was done by former President John Kufour so Kofi Jumah’s statement therefore means the former president ‘banked’ the woman before offering her the position.
This is really interesting especially when the former president has come under barrages of attacks from the public for his strong interest in women.

There was even a joke about his alleged romance a female television presenter in this country and how after taking off her cloth the lady, out of anxiety took a gentle look at him. Mr. Kufour was reported to have told the lady in the Akan language; are u surprise is me the sitting president who is undressing you, huh? I have several times heard other jokes in that same direction. Therefore if Kofi Jumah’s comment gives credence to that rumour, then it means most of those pretty ladies in several positions had to ease their clothe for the ‘big man’ to sample their joyous places in sleeping arrangements before taking their appointment letters.

Only time will tell.

Ms. Mo’s sex diary.

Who doesn’t like the smell of sex stories? We all do! Especially when elements making up the story are not only hot and spicy but send the entire nation running after straws, are still unclear, we still persist in getting the whole pie. And so for a woman in her late 20s to get the whole of Ghana talking about sex, robber and free speech must be unique.

She must have the brains of great writers such as Günter Grass, Stephen King or Toni Morrison or Maya Angelou, ---and to tell able to tell such a compelling story that even elements within both the National Democratic Congress and the New Patriotic Party will, without a surprise, throw mud at each other, Ms. Mo must obviously be an award winning writer.

The unfortunate thing however is that the content of her diary, though spiced with bouts of sex, remains unclear. Nobody knows exactly what the content of her diary truly is, not even those on the bus. Except for the driver and other passengers who had said that, indeed, the bus came under fire but the driver was smart enough to whisk them away, the content of her diary remains unclear. Even the lawyers defending her are not certain the actual details as contained in the diary.

I heard the driver myself on Metro TV’s “Good Evening Ghana” programme on Tuesday, 2 November 2010, repeating the exact things I had read elsewhere of him. He was alleged to have sexed five women continuously until he lost consciousness and had to be resuscitated by the robbers to continue his job. There was also the account that an old woman was sexed by an energetic youngman to the extent that she was thanking him for a ‘good job’ done.

Then there was also the account that a man traveling with his 14 year old daughter was subjected to complete humiliation when he was asked by the robbers to sex his own daughter. I must confess my spirit sank into despair when I heard that particular chilling account. But it is now emerging all these reports were completely made up by Amina for whatever reasons best known to her.

Not so much of Ms. Mo’s account but the sudden desperation on the side of politicians to make capital out of the mess she has invited onto herself makes me sick. What the heck are they trying to prove? So far I have heard unreasonable commentaries from officials of both the National Democratic Congress and the New Patriotic Party give their own account as to how the incident appears.

The NDC’s chap in Cape Coast called Allotey Jacobs, who talks as if he’s fanning a dead elephant in a deep forest, claimed the account put out by Amina was at the behest of elements in the opposition NPP to discredit the government.

It was a rather irresponsible comment which to the best of my knowledge should be ignored-but I was wrong. NPP’s party Chairman Jake Obetsebi Lamptey, one of former president’s Kufour’s boys who spent time in office grabbing properties with both hands and feet, launched a tirade on Jacobs, describing his comment as balderdash.

Subsequent to that, I have heard elements within the pro NPP Alliance for Accountable Governance group slammed the police communication director, Kwesi Ofori, as being inconsistent with his own accounts of events. I thought that was the height of stupidity and insincerity. The NPP left power barely two years ago and it was the same policeman who was running around defending the government.

When the parcels of cocaine mysteriously disappeared from the police headquarters during the reign of the NPP, it was this same policeman who was all over the place defending the service and government. Even when it was clear that the former IGP had been cited as being friends with one of the then baron, Issa Abbas, Kwesi Ofori went out on his own way to defend him and the government.

It is unfortunate but when you hear people in the caliber of the AFAG’s and their like minds talk, you wonder if there is any hope for this country.

I also heard another element say what is happening is stifling free speech. This is obviously a stupid statement to make. It is clear they’re chasing up this Amina story purely for political gains, they don’t mean well for the youngwoman.

Her mess is their gain.

MPs should pay for their own laptops

Two weeks following their return to parliament, Ghana’s MPs were handed out laptops by the Communication Ministry. The laptops handed out to the 230 parliamentarians fitted with moderns, according to Communication Minister Haruna Iddrisu, is to help the MPs do research to help in their work.

Mr. Iddrisu again justified his ministry’s decision by saying, “Parliament is such an important institution and if we are serious - in the 21st Century – we should be talking about e-Parliament, e-cabinet.” A lot of people disagreed with the decision to handout the gadgets for the MPs for free. I am one of them. But there are others like my friend and colleague blogger Kajsa(www.kajsaha.com) who disagrees with me. She thinks the MPs deserve the gadgets because it will help in their works and also push the boundary of accountability a bit.

But before I come to her I’ll like to first respond to Mr. Iddrisu’s explanation that the laptops will help the MPs undertake research exercise. I want him to come and tell the public which of his colleagues or even himself have been conducting research into any of their works, and how that has impacted in their work.

This bare face attempt to hand in laptops to himself and colleagues under very cloudy circumstances is not true. And in any case what kind of research is he going to conduct? Any potential person wanting to become an MP does so because of the money-and it has nothing to do with any serious parliamentary work-no wonder they fight during campaign periods. And the evidence(s) is not too difficult to find-the sale of Ghana Telecom, the accusation of a jet etc.

Now back to Kajsa’s argument. MPs like any other politician or citizen deserve to get their fingers tune on to the things of cyberspace else risk becoming insignificant. It is the trend over the world and they must follow the same trend. I agree with that. My point is that it should not be the state funding or paying for the laptops.

If the MPs want laptops to help them in their work they should pay for them. They collect hefty sums of money at the end of their term (and this is apart from the sitting allowances at committee levels, those collected from organisations and individuals before they even submit their petitions to the committee levels) as ex-gratia, for huffing and puffing in the house on partisan lines, at the detriment of the nation. At the close of parliament in 2008, each MP collected more than US$30,000 as ex-gratia. And this also excludes their car loans and the many per diems most of them receive on travel trips.

An MP is currently using a vehicle worth more than US$ 20,000, free accommodation and all the trappings that come with his office. It will therefore be politically incorrect for one to say they cannot afford laptops. They should get their own if truly they need them to undertake research.

Secondly, I find this excuse about constituents demanding accountability from the MPs pretty strange. Prior to standing for elections, the MPs themselves tell their constituents of their readiness to be open and transparent in their dealings.

They surely knew at the time that they did not have laptops and so I’m wondering how a new laptop in their hands will help constituents demand accountability from their MPs. How many of their constituents know how to use emails?

It is a fact that more than 60 percent of our rural communities, where most of these MPs come from, are not ICT savvy, so how do they demand accountability from their MPs via the email? A constituent who has no running water or has bad school structure does not need an email address to inform the MP(and its said people are asking them to do roads and build schools just because they promised such things on their campaign platforms, though theirs are to make laws).

The MP should be visiting the constituency every weekend to interact with their people and not sit in Accra and lavish in ‘profligate enjoyments’ with their own. After all what matter to the ordinary folks are how to address the bad road networks, energy supply and safe drinking water. Those are the essentials people want and which, unfortunately, the MPs are not talking about at all.

They’ll rather sit in parliament and see their constituents walk up to them begging for handouts; school fees, funeral donations, weddings etc-And they go through all because they promise them.

Some even find it frustrating going back to their constituents because of the poor nature of the roads- but are quick to pitch camp there during elections. Accountability for me will when they hold government accountable for every single bill or money spent, irrespective of their political affiliations.

I’m confident these laptops will end up either in the rooms of their girlfriends, kids or even wives. Or at best become a toy on which they watch their lousy movies.

There are serious crises in our education which require that we spend money to resolve that and if our priority is about getting laptops to save the parochial interest of the MPs, then God help us.

I rest my case!

What will make Rawlings happy?

Early this week when Mr. Rawlings released a statement accusing some members within his own party of spoiling his name, the question I heard a passenger I was traveling in a commercial vehicle (trotro) asked was: ‘What will make Rawlings happy? I did not pay much attention to the question until later in the day when I had furnished myself with the entire content of his statement that I began doing my own analysis.

Mr. Rawlings claimed, among other things, that the government under John Mills has failed to prosecute ‘corrupt’ officials of the New Patriotic Party. He said members of the party and Ghanaians are losing faith in the government as a result of that. He also revealed a rift between himself and President Mills, and admitted things have not been right with them at all. It is their own business to resolve.

I must say Jerry Rawlings was somebody I admired as a kid. He was the only face I knew on television back at the time. The first time I saw him in the flesh was in 1988 at a public rally. He was due to arrival at mid-day but even before the time, the whole lorry park where the meeting was to take place was packed. The crowd was huge and even though I managed to get to the place before 10am, I had to struggle to get a good place so I can see him.

I managed to secure a place on top of broken down truck and though I was crumbled by big guys in the crowd, I was still happy I might see him. Mr. Rawlings arrived hours later to a thunderous applause and shouts of his name. He was in military uniform. I must confess I still don’t recall exactly what he said at the time except that I clapped and yelled alongside those present.

But years on when I started picking up lessons in global politics on the streets, one of the books I read was ‘The Rawlings Factor’ by one Shellington. It chronicles some of the events of Mr. Rawlings during his time as a military leader; his successes and failures. It was a well written book with good language pattern.

I remember vividly how Rawlings exited power in 2000 when his party lost. Contrary to opinions he was not going to leave power especially when most African leaders have entrenched themselves in office, Mr. Rawlings left. He earned high praise in the process. But that was short lived. He started attacking the sitting government at the time. He accused them of everything; corruption, murder and lies.

His privileges were taken away from him-though I thought it was a rather stupid decision taken by John Kufour and his boys at the time. He continued his tirade on the government until they lost power in 2009. It was a devastating defeat that the entire NPP structure is still nursing.

So with the NDC in power most people thought Mr. Rawlings will be quiet and allow things to run, but he will. He turned his attention to the sitting government and its officials, accusing some of them of being ‘corrupt’ and ‘latter day saints’ who have just joined the party ranks to enjoy goodies.

He has kept the same line of insults and accusations he leveled against John Kufour on the NDC government. Together with his hatchment men, Mr. Rawlings has consistently launched a blistering attack on the president and his team. He even accused him of surrounding himself with ‘bastards.’ He used the most unfortunate language ‘who born dog’ to even describe them.

But what could be happening to Rawlings? That is one question most people like myself continue to ruminate over. The speculation is that he is desperately seeking control over the government for the gains of himself and family. His desperation to get officials of the past government prosecute has even been interpreted as politics of vengeance.

He thinks the current president should just arrest past officials of the government who misconducted themselves. I am for the prosecution of corrupt officials-obviously I can’t see how Wereko Brobbey and Kwadwo Mpiani can be allowed to go home and enjoy the loot from the Ghana@50 mess. But, like others, the wheel of justice grind slowly and the best all of us can do is to just hope and pray the right checks are done so these hoodlums are kept behind bars. But until that has taken place, Mr. Rawlings should just hold his fire. He should let the current president be.

It is rather bizarre and petty that his own wife will even be upset because a picture of the husband and President Mills who to be sharing a joke was published in newspapers. What kind of foolish thinking is this, Madam Konadu? Sometimes I don’t want to take to heart the many ranting of Kwaku Baako, who has a strong fixation towards Rawlings-but some of us are beginning to agree with most of the things he says about the Rawlings’; that they are seeking control so they can get whatever they want from government.

It is in the interest of Mr. Rawlings to make sure the NDC stays in power. At least if for nothing at all, he’ll get the goodies being splash on party officials. But if at this time and he does not even trust his own party members for addressing his so-called concerns, does he think the NPP will do that?

Mr. Rawlings should by now remember that he is an elder statesman and recently appointed African Union envoy to Somalia and should know how to behave. He is making himself pretty much irrelevant to the course of history in this country and losing the political plot

His irreverent attitude towards the institutions of state is not helping his own image at all. Mr. Rawlings should be grateful to Ghanaians for once- it was at the back of the many ordinary and impoverished Ghanaians that he managed to get ‘friends’ to pay for the tuition of his children abroad.

Today one of them is a medical doctor, another is a lawyer and until recently, the boy was working at the bank. Not many families who had supported him over the years are fortunate enough to even put their children through secondary school.
Most of them are still struggling to even come by a penny to help them get into ‘trotro’ from one destination to the other.

Ghana MPs; wet dreams, failed grades and pay rise.

Wet dreamers calling themselves MPs want a pay rise. I thought it was a sick joke the first time I heard it; a kind of an ‘April Fools’ thing happening in October. But I was wrong. It was real. MPs want pay rise and this time around, they want 20 percent increase. I felt like weeping blood. These guys are not only crooks but incompetent and they want the average taxpayer to reward them for their mess.

The report said the MPs had threatened to go public with their grievances but had to be persuaded to halt their so-called ‘going public outbursts’ by deputy majority leader Rashid Pelpuo.

“It is no longer a big problem now, the Members of Parliament would easily recognize this effort, because before the next three days or before the end of this week I believe very strongly that a cheque will be ready and all of them would be happy smiling to the bank to clear what is due them for all these years, which has kept them earning far, far less below the standard of a Member of Parliament.”

Also, I find the claims made by Pelpuo to the effect that MPs salary is about US$D500 month pretty rubbish. Does he know how much a civil servant who has worked his ass of for decades earn in a month? That is stupid to say the least. How on earth can MPs who are on what they want us to believe is a meager salary drive around in four wheel drives, eat in the best restaurants, hire rooms for their concubines, as well as furnish that for them. I want Pelpuo and his brigade of MPs to come forward and tell Ghanaians such crap.

Again, the MPs claim to the effect that their salaries have not been paid for weeks is laughable. Do they know the pain civil servants go through in this country? Most of them have not been paid for months. There are some whose salaries are not even enough to get into a public transport for a month, and they are not even complaining. What rubbish! They can go to hell for all that Ghanaians care. After all the ex-gratia, car loans and allowances paid to them, these gluttons think we should pay for their idiotic pleasures’ sexing up prostitutes etc.

Their ridiculous demands for pay rise can’t be justified with any serious work. Do they expect us to reward them for their idiotic behavior in the so-called august house, where most of them throw punches at each other at the least provocation? Or they expect us to reward them for sleeping in parliament or the failed grades most of them got as per the ranking by African Watch magazine?

They are sick in the head. What has happened to the ex-gratia they took more than 13 months ago during the change of government? They should give us a break. If anyone really wants to know how useless those MPs are, then the answer lies in the grading system issued by the African Watch magazine on Monday 18th October, 2010. Majority of them got failed marks.

And did I hear that MP from Ada Sege in the Greater Accra Region Felix Abayatei complained bitterly about the results? His electoral fortunes are at stake. This was the same MP who denied the existence of child labour in his constituency. When such hoodlums are elected into parliament, only the creator knows the kind of decisions they’ll pass on our heads. He scored ‘F’ and instead of ruminating over it, he chose to open his stinky mouth issuing a threat to haul the publisher of the magazine before the so-called ‘privileges committee.’ What nonsense.

The country is at the moment grabbling with how to resolve the mess in the education system and all these stinky gluttons think about is their already bloated stomachs. Greed! Lecturers at the country’s tertiary institutions are on strike and rather than proposing ideas about how to resolve that, all these political tsetse- flies think about is their personnel welfare. Such attitude makes me appreciate the greed in that parliament house. No wonder heavy face, inept, sleepy and greedy former speaker of parliament, Ebenezer Sakyi Hughes, could stand on his two balls and ransack the entire furnish including the floor tiles at the time he was retiring.

The most foolish statements I often hear them make is this thing about ‘making sacrifices for the country. What sacrifice? Their level of greed is no different from an untrained dog whose insatiable appetite to grab almost anything leads him on a ‘grabbing spree,’ where he grabs with hands and feet so the next animal doesn’t get anything to feed on.

Then again you have these same MPs organized press conference and react to another callous statement made by a deputy tourism minister to the effect that somebody is coming from a village, and deserves to be enlightened.